The Deer Lover

Yesterday while running errands I ended up stopped at a light behind a giant pickup truck. This particular driver seemed to be quite the wilderness fan, because he had a few interesting accessories on his ride (and I can't believe I found them on the web- of course I found this earlier, so anything's possible). On his back window he had this:

Okay, sure. I guess this really taps into the "Nature is Beautiful" market, and some people like deer. I guess they're okay and all, but it's not something I would hang a painting of in my house, let alone adorn my car with. Of course, there was one year at State Fair (Band Day, of course) that my buddy Andrew and I ducked into the Pepsi Coliseum because it was the only air-conditioned building on the fairgrounds and it was hot as all h-e-double hockey sticks outside. I mention this because inside said coliseum was a livestock auction. Farm folk would parade around their cows or whatnot while the announcer would tell us what we were looking at. He would describe the animals the way car magazines sometimes describe a new model, by which I mean borderline sexual and definitely creepy. He said things like "You can just sense the raw power of the hind quarters, with a very developed, muscular torso" while Andrew and I shifted uncomfortably in our seats. The one statement that I can recite verbatim (as it was indelibly burned into my memory) was "Now this here is a beautiful steer. I could look at this steer all day." Keep in mind that he was dead serious. I digress, but the point is that some people love animals. On the other hand, after a few more vivid animal descriptions we decided that the air-conditioning wasn't really worth it.

So it was established that this guy likes deer. I figured him for a hunter, but maybe he was one of those guys who likes to hunt because it lets him get out into nature and fantasize about steer. Then, I noticed his trailer hitch cover:
Click the picture. You know you want to. That is the "Hitch Critters" light up, animated trailer hitch cover. When you apply the brake, the target (I $hit you not) lights up, and the deer frantically waves his arms in the don't shoot motion depicted here. All of this makes for quite and effect when combined with the look of sheer terror frozen in the deer's eyes.

This is a good time to mention that I don't have a problem with hunting. First and foremost, deer are wild cow. They meander about in the woods, eating grass and bark, and they fill their spot on the food chain. Hunting is really the only means we have of controlling the population, so as long as they stick within the limits, go for it. I don't see how anyone who eats meat can oppose (regulated) hunting. I think a lot of this has to do with the Bambi effect, by which I mean deer romanticized as something greater than say, a goat. My pastor in high school once made a point about how Hollywood influences people, by pointing out that hunting dropped dramatically after Bambi was released in theatres. I tend to believe that it was because the US had just entered World War II, but that's just me. Keep in mind that this is the same pastor who presented me with the watch theory.

What troubles me about this truck was the dichotomy it presented. It's like the window says "I like deer," and the hitch adds "by which I mean I like to shoot them." Like "This is where deer live, and this is where I insert the bullet." "This is how deer look frolicking in the woods, and this is what they look like begging for their lives." It's like the guy is at once trying to show that he loves nature's creatures, but also makes comical references to killing defenceless animals in cold blood.

Maybe the "Don't Shoot" deer was part of an anti-hunting statement, but somehow I doubt it.