Calling All Boilermakers!

That's right friends, Purdue needs your help! Jim alerted me to on online poll to determine the best college mascot, and in another example of my worlds colliding, Purdue is up against Michigan State as the Boilermaker Special takes on Sparty.

I like the way the poll is done as a playoff, with four different regions: Humans, Inanimates/Mythological, Predators, and Land Animals. If you look at the brackets, you'll notice that Purdue ended up in the Human regions. A common mistake! Apparently CBS assumed that Purdue's mascot is Purdue Pete. Luckily, the error has been corrected this week and they now acknowledge the Boilermaker Special. However, the Special is still competing in the Human region in what should be a sure path to victory. C'mon, as though a drunk Irishman (still the nation's most offensive mascot) could stop a speeding locomotive.

As for this week's matchup, I will concede that on a guy-in-a-costume-dancing-around-on-the-sidelines basis, I would probably give the nod to the fantastic Sparty costume over the jersey and fiberglass head that is Purdue Pete. But an ancient Greek versus an engineering marvel that reshaped the world as we know it? Psshaw. Plus, which is more appropriate for the school? I rest my case.

As a side note, are any of the other competitors really inanimate objects? You might be able to make a case for the Cyclones and Green Wave (which is also awesome) but those are at least weather phenomena. Plus, it's important to remember the difference between nickname and mascot. Iowa State's nickname is the "Cyclones," but their mascot is Cy the Cardinal. Tulane is the Green Wave, but their mascot is a pelican. I will continue to believe that the Boilermaker Special is the only inanimate mascot until some school becomes the "boulders," or the "hammers" or something and the mascot is an anthropomorphized hammer.

Now that I think about it, the next time I buy Madden or some game where you make your own team, I'm going to call them the Hammers. Think about it- their nickname could be the "Tools," which would be one of those endearing nicknames that started out as an insult- like say, Boilermakers. Like the way those of us in the band world refer to our self as "band dorks." The Hammers could play at craftsman stadium (nicknamed the "Tool Box"), and corporate giveaway options are endless. I think I'm on to something here.

OH! I just thought of a couple. Tulsa's nickname is the Golden Hurricanes, but their official mascot is Captain Cane, who is a terrifying hurricane. So he's in the running. But, The University of Toledo (the Rockets) seems to have two mascots, both of whom go by Rocky the Rocket. One is a Power Ranger looking astronaut guy, and the other is an inflatable rocket character (with a sidways hat, so we know he's a tool). I don't know which one is the "offical" mascot, but the Special might have some competetion in the truly inanimate realm.