Mother of the Year

Take a look at this picture I snapped on the Metro last weekend. And don't worry, I was super sneaky when I took it.Seems cute, right? A mother on the train sharing her iPod with her toddler son? Well, let me augment the picture for you with some details from the real-life experience: The music was

a) Absolutely blasting. I couldn't make out all the lyrics, but it was definitely

b) Rap. The repetitive bass and cymbal let me know that she was not listening to The Wiggles with her son. At one point we positively identified Party Like a Rock Star, and something tells me that it wasn't the edited version.

Am I the only one who finds this incredibly wrong? Shouldn't everybody know that blasting music into your toddler's ears could cause permanent damage? Plus, at one point she took his earphone out, upon which he immediately launched into a tantrum, yelling and kicking and grabbing for it until she put it back in his ear. It was bizarre, but at least he enjoys it.

Also, notice that she has her cell phone stuffed in her bra. I guess when your ears are bleeding from the sound overload you want to make sure you can feel the vibrating ringer!

Totally unrelated: I walked into my kitchen last night, and I got that feeling on my face like I had just run into a spider web. I looked up and there was, in fact, a big spider web running right down the middle of my kitchen. We're talking about an 8x12-ish room, and it was running the long way. It was pretty impressive, but is there really enough bug traffic in my kitchen to warrant a web right there?

One Day, Three Annoyances

These three things happened in succession on Sunday, and only one was actually annoying. From least to most irritating:

1. I used up the soap in my shower, so I needed a new bar. I could've sworn I had just bought a huge pack, but I looked everywhere and couldn't find it. So when I was out I went to BJ's and bought a gigantor pack of like 20 bars. After restocking the bathroom I thought "I'll store the rest of this under the sink in the guest bathroom." Anybody want to guess what was already there? That's right, the last huge pack of soap. I hate being dumb.

2. It was doing a little snow/sleet/winter-mix thing, so it was a little wet on and off. At the grocery store there was lady in her power suit loading a ton of bags into her car. It was taking her a while, because she was only using one hand, the other being tied up with her huge umbrella. If she wasn't so focused on the task at hand, she might have noticed that it had stopped raining like 10 minutes ago. I used to always notice this effect on rainy days in college- several people would walk around with their umbrella open when it hadn't been raining for an hour. In any case, no, this didn't affect me at all- I just don't understand people.

3. Now, this did suck: After working out I hit Subway for my new standard Sunday lunch, and I walked in right after another lady. At this point there were 4 people in the Subway: Me, the lady, and 2 employees behind the sneeze guard. She orders a sub. Then another, and by this time I've noticed that she was reading off a list. The employees continue to work in series, like they always do- one starting the bread and meat, and the other doing the toppings. The lady has to keep consulting her list, because they're all special orders. I finally peek over her shoulder, and she has a full-on matrix of what all her (I'm assuming) co-workers want- 12 in all! The orders keep coming, tying up both employees, and at several points they would get confused and have to stop and count sandwiches, sometimes unwrap a few to see what they have. Don't even get me started with the toasting- apparently there wasn't a box for that on the form so it was a big question every time. "Is it usually toasted? Would you toast it? What do most people like?" Kill me!

It's not like I was in a hurry, but remember: I walked up seconds after this lady, and there was no one else in there. I wanted one 12" turkey and ham sub. It takes them approximately 45 seconds to crank one of those out. If the lady was a little more polite, maybe she would have offered to let me go first. It's not like she didn't see me. Not to mention that she tied up the entire staff for 15 minutes! Of course, I can't totally absolve the employees. Why couldn't one of them have helped me while the other kept helping Mrs. Big Spender? I was near the point of banging my head on the old New York-themed walls when she turns around and says with a smile "I'm so sorry, this is the last one!" to which I smile and reply "Oh, that's okay! Don't worry about it!" I was actually thinking "If you were truly sorry, maybe you would've spared an employee for 45 seconds and not sucked a quarter hour out of my life A$$HOLE!"

And you know what else? She finally paid and walked away, forgetting her 14-odd cookies. I grabbed them and ran after her to hand them over. If I didn't get like a million karma points, then there is just no justice in the world.